if not sleep, then what?

so there i was, lying in bed, trying to sleep. to get some much needed sleep after a hard busy day. but through the window the light shines. it illuminates my room in a way that makes it impossible to find peace and solace and fall into the rest and recuperation of a good night's sleep.

Yet the light shines in as if this is not a time that i should be sleeping. As if God has another plan for me rather than the one i've been assuming. (for isn't that what night is for... rest?)

i close my eyes and try to ignore the light, but on it shines, relentlessly disturbing my plan. I pull the blanket over my eyes, but to no avail (and i can't explain why).

Leave me be, let me alone. It's been a tough day, this is what i need. I know this is what i need.

... but do i really know?

How do i know this?

Only cause of how i feel and because of what the world (and parents...) has dictated to me for years and years.

But what does this world--tainted by sin, by evil, by a clouded vision--know of truth and genuine need?

So, instead of sleeping, i wrote this--in search of a light (or perhaps in this case, an extinguisher for the light).

My eyes grow heavy, and i feel i may have stumbled across something important. Something that will entice my thoughts for days. And perhaps even lead me down new roads...

But for now, it will leave me to rest, for the light fades, and sleep calls to me.

~time to re-think the thoughts of a sinner's ways~