Wanting him is hard to get.
Loving him is hard to regret.
Losing him is hard to accept.
But with all the hurt I've felt,
Letting go is the most painful yet...
I was happy: happier than i had been in a long time. I felt wanted, needed, important... I, for the first time ever, had something i knew i wanted, something to work towards and planned to one day reach. I felt like i had a purpose.
I had never cared for someone else like that before, it felt so real yet, simultaneously, so far away and unattainable. It was everything people said it would be and more.
Nothing hurts more than realising he meant everything to you,
but you meant nothing to him.
He heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds
ps.147:3
Now that it's done i want to move on, to heal, but i don't want to forget the happiness i once felt. I'm discovering that both, concurrently, are impossible. Move on, or remember girl... it's time to choose.
A heart is not a play thing,
A heart is not a toy,
But if you want it broken,
just give it to a boy.
It's hard though, when everything you do and everything you see somehow reminds you of him and times you shared or plans you had. It's like i need to erase my mind completely, to forget how much this meant to me, and how much i believed in it...
~you can't hold on forever~
3 comments:
~Keep Singing~
Another rainy day, I can't recall having sunshine on my face.
All I feel is pain, all I wanna do - is walk out of this place.
But when I am stuck and I can't move, when I don't know what I should do, when I wonder if I'll ever make it through....
But I gotta keep singing, I gotta keep praising Your name.
That's the only way that I find healing.
Can I climb up in You lap? I don't wanna leave, Jesus sing over me. I gotta keep singing. Oh You're everything I need, and I gotta keep singing....
-Mercy Me
~All Because of This~
Why do we do the things we do?
How can we sing when there seems no reason to?
How do we smile when there's not much to smile about?
When the world is down, who are we to stand and shout?
They wonder why we do the things we do.
It's all because of this,
It's all because of this,
We've tasted love, tasted hope, tasted holiness.
And they wonder why we do the things we do...
-Mercy Me
~My Prayer~
Fresh page, new pen,
Where do I begin?
Words fail, tears come,
I need someone
To take the thoughts I almost think,
And carry them to God for me.
Deep breath, exhale, breath in deeper still
Long sigh, I'm still numb,
Is there anyone?
Who can find the things I'm barely feeling,
And give them wings beyond my ceiling?
Right heart, wrong place,
It's too far to outerspace.
Sorry, I forgot, You're right here
I cup my hands around Your ear.
I feel You smile, You feel my breath
You listen while I whisper nonsense.
Simple exchange,
Your will, I'm changed
And now my prayer ends,
Thank-You, Amen
-Chris Rice
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