Wait At Least A Year

You put us on pause to give yourself more time. But I ask, why can't it be simultaneous? Whoever said two changes, growths, or advancements can't be accomplished together. Stability is a state of mind. It need not be financial or professional. If you are ready for the next step, than surrounding factors need not interfere. The next big adventure is waiting for you at your finger tips. Stop brushing and reach out.

 

~apparently our time lines neither align, nor intertwine~

Blinders

I read this quote and thought it was cute. And true. If guys (and girls for that matter) spent their time thinking of new ways to show their significant other that they love them, then they'll have less time thinking about non-significant others. If we stop thinking about ourselves, and what would make us 'happy' and instead thought of ways to make others happy, then I think the end result would be 2 happy people.


The quote also reminded me of a song (because ultimately, almost everything in life reminds me of a song).
So here's the song, and lyrics (because to me, that's where the meaning and value lies)

While the above song is by an Andrew Allen, I see here fit to share lyrics from a song by a Kris Allen. I don't think there is any relation.

Kris says,
"We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or to throw it all away
We gotta tell them that we love them
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we're dying"

~start living in love~

It Separates the Men from the Travelers

My Kindergarten student (Kayson) came to school today, all dressed up in black slacks  and a shiny, long-sleeved, button down purple shirt. For a kid who is most commonly seen in sweatpants and an athletic shirt, this came as a bit of a shock to me.
And so I asked him, "Kayson, you look handsome today. What's the occasion?"
He looked up at me and said, "I had to wear it to show you my purple shirt."

Before Christmas, Kayson had told me he'd asked his Grandma for a purple shirt for Christmas. At the time I thought it was an odd request for a 6 year old.
Now that I see the shirt, I know it is an odd request for a 6 year old.
But man did he ever look cute!

This look, but without the pinstripes and on a 6 year old. 

In other news. 

One of my boys came to school this morning and informed me that they were leaving for Mexico tonight for a month. 

Thanks for the heads up.

~maybe I'll move to Russia~

'I have an Announcement'

One of my students tells me today, "You know Mexican's aren't just Mexican's they're people too."
Trying to stifle my laughter I asked him, "oh yeah, where did you hear that?"
"On a movie."


During our school assembly this morning, our principal was making announcements about upcoming events. When he was done with his information, he asked the fellow teachers, and the student government if they had anything to add. One of my little girls raised her hand, when the principal called on her she declared, "and we're starting 'show and tell' in our class'."
Thanks for sharing dear...


It's good to laugh at least once a day. 

Take My Hand

Three facebook friends have announced their engagements over the last 24 hours. It's an epidemic! Or perhaps they are influenced by the impending "end of the world." The same thing happened before and during the World Wars, and (according to Mrs. Weasley) at the height of Voldemort's power the first time around. In the face of fear and uncertainty, human beings cling to one another. It is in other's we find love and hope, and ultimately a reason for living. It is for this reason that, when faced with the possibility of death or world wide pandemonium, we seek refuge in each other. The fear or doubt that might otherwise influence, are forgotten in the surrounding unease.
I guess it takes war and bedlam for Love to become our foundation.

~Mason remains unperturbed ~

Advice from Dumbledore

Memories Bring only Tears

My holidays are over, and I'm now home- if I can call such a place home.
It is windy, quiet, lonely. Home is suppose to be where my heart is, but my heart is anywhere but here. My heart is with the people I love, and the things I love doing. This place lacks all the essentials. Sure my stuff is here, and my life (if you can call it that) is here, but I struggle to find joy in this windy, snowless, desolate place.
Rather than living, I feel like I'm stuck on pause. For a slight moment I was in play but it was quick-barely a blink. And now I've been returned to this painful, emotionally deprived state.
I long for a change, yet the time is constantly prolonged.

~Living on a Prayer~

Slowly Going Crazy

After over a month apart, we will be reunited. Then for our adventure! You, me, my family, and my home town. All my favourite- crazy things -all wrapped into one. But the time is going so slow! I know it's less then a week away, but last week felt like a month. So what are these next 4 days going to feel like? And of course, once we're together, time will move at warp speed, and our 2 weeks together will be over in a blink.
It's just not fair.

COUNTDOWN CLOCKS

Good Advice

Robert Pattinson Quote : "If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are. Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads."

So This Is Love

When I saw this picture I recalled this song my sister use to sing. I wonder if anyone ever warned them of the consequences? I hope not... paranoia can keep you from experiencing so much joy. 

The cutest boy, I ever saw, was sipping soda from a straw. The cutest boy I ever saw, was sipping soda from a straw.

I asked him if he'd teach me how, to sip my soda, from a straw. I asked him if he'd teach me how, to sip my soda from a straw.

So cheek to cheek, and nose to nose, we sipped our soda from a straw. So cheek to cheek and nose to nose, we sipped our soda from a straw. 

Then suddenly, the straw did slip, we sipped our soda lip to lip. Then suddenly the straw did slip- we sipped our soda lip to lip.

That's how I got my mother in law, and 15 kids to call my 'ma'. That's how I got my mother in law, and 15 kids to call me 'ma'.

The moral of this little tail, is sip your soda from a pail. The moral of this little tail, is sip your soda from a pail.

~ewwww cooties!~

Lesson 1

It happened yesterday. It was the very end of the day- thankfully. It had been a long, though rather unproductive day of sitting in the gymnasium doing dress rehearsals of our Christmas Concert. My kids were surprisingly patient, but it wore on them, especially by the end.
The bell had just rung, and I dismissed the class. Suddenly, Abbott, one of my grade 3 boys, with the tough exterior and often "too cool for school" attitude, burst in to tears.
Thankfully most of the class had already left the classroom. I made my way over to Abbott,his head was down, wrapped in his arms. Having no idea what this was about I cautiously put my hand on his shoulder and asked him what was the matter.
Barely lifting his head, he bitterly declared, "Taban is calling me names, and making fun of me."
Taban, who was one of my other grade 3 boys, and also still in the room retorted, "No, I wasn't!"
Wanting to resolve this quickly I asked Abbott, "what exactly did he say to you to make fun of you?"
Abbott spat in disgust, "he said I was in love with you!"

I bit my tongue quickly to keep from laughing. How horrible he made it sound- to be in love with me! Or at least the thought of being in love with me!


I know that they are just children, and the very idea of love is still absolutely repellent... but perhaps this feeling isn't wholly foreign to people my age too. Not the feeling of fondness towards someone, but that weak feeling you get... when you feel lost, or forgotten when you're not with that person.
Men pride themselves in strength- physical as well as emotional. Love defies these "rules" and so when it happens, they are filled with confusion... and ultimately aversion.
If they don't admit it, they didn't commit it, and so pain and frailty can never happen.

~how I sleep at night~

twisted

the world may always be opposed

with pretended morals, and blurred lines.
rough, seasoned hands
compel the soft and innocent.
their cry of fear taken for pleasure
in time becoming indifference.

with hands tied down
and threats thoroughly set
the choice is no longer yours.
take me now, you hear.

pushed up against the wall
bound and teased
no say in the matter
this is pleasure


~this is skewed and misleading~

In My Mind's Eye

Have you seen the movie In Time? It has a powerful message mixed within the violence and action. But ultimately, it is about a time when time is currency, and when you run out of time, you die. The rich all live in their own area with millions of years to spare, while the poor are living by the hour, working- literally- to stay alive. 
~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~    

The other night, I had a dream with a similar story line. Time was our currency, but instead of  dying when we run out of time, we are hunted for sport. Adds another element of entertainment I suppose. Mason was in my dream, and he was complaining about Time as currency- I told him that he wasn't allowed to complain, because when we watched the movie he said he liked it. 

In my dream, a friend and I were struggling. We were down to minutes and we had nothing else valuable to sell to get us more time. Somehow we ended up in some kind of a brothel. These men came in after us, and right away they hired us. 

The man who chose me, I quickly learned, had prosthetic arms. He started taking himself a part, and I was doing all I could to not be completely disgusted with what I was about to do. As I was sitting there waiting, I heard noises indicating other transactions were not being delayed as mine was. I wished to just get this over and done with so I could escape from this current hell.

Right as it was about to start, a man rushed in (who was not Mason, but whom apparently I was in a relationship with). He declared he loved me, and then proposed to me- not with a diamond, but with a huge bank of time!

I soon learned that the man with the prosthesis was in fact completely artificial! He was a robot my fiance had created to watch and protect me. 

How romantic...?

I also learned that the time given to me by my fiance was stollen from his brother, and his brother was now after us.  More action and entertainment followed as we were being chased by an angry, bitter man with hunters after him. 

My future brother in law died having jumped into a ravine following us. We were both quite devastated, but apparently he was a corrupt man, and he had what was coming to him.

~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~            ~   
Talk about a strange dream. What exactly was my mind trying to tell me in all this? Or am I silly to be searching for a message in this?


~it was more the anticipation~

AHH

I know I already posted today, but I've fallen in love, and I couldn't wait a moment to share it!!
I don't know if you've heard of Andrew Allen before. If you have- you suck for not sharing him with me! If you haven't- today's your lucky day!!
His lyrics, and voice. His energy, and genuineness. It's like he truly means what he's singing. Of course it doesn't hurt that he's cute, and has amazingly intense eyes. And that stubble really works for him.

Check out his stuff.

And because the Christmas season is nearly here (3 weeks today is Christmas eve- one of my favourite days of the year!) here you can here the song that got my sister and I stated on him last year- though very slowly I am sad to say.

~say it to me~

As of Late

Sizzling, spiced, and decadent.
A taste that can be satisfied daily. Let the amount increase exponentially.
My mouth waters, and my hands shake. Anticipation. Like an airplane coming in for a landing, the hanger door wide open, yearning to be filled.
Let all other activities be forgotten, and only this take our time.
But together.
Alone it lacks meaning. Without heart, passion. Instead I remain aching for that which I am unmotivated to achieve.
Left alone in these cravings is wretched and cruel.
I call to you, my body, heart, and stomach.
Listen.

~already won~

boys vs girls

~we don't mean to miscommunicate~

Jolly Old Saint Nicholas, Lean Your Ear This Way

I like to give my kids the opportunity to share with the rest of the class about their weekends. Most of the times it's 13 kids telling me they watched a movie, or two... (I thought that Mennonites didn't like technology?).

Today I was telling them that I went to the city and did some Christmas shopping. I told them that I had a present for everyone except my sister. Suddenly the kids were sharing all sorts of ideas with me:
- a barbie: but put it in a box so she won't know what it is
- a jack-in-the box that will pop out and scare her!
- a ballerina from prison (?) [Kayson's idea, he was completely serious]
- a horse (which ended up becoming a horse with chicken pox, because for some reason my kids are currently obsessed with chicken pox)

They were all so willing and excited to give me ideas, I didn't have the heart to tell them that she was 20 years old. But maybe she would like a jack-in-the-box?!

~the child in me~

A Warm Snowy Night Would Be a Start

Have you ever played "Never have I ever"?
There are a few versions of it... there's the drinking-game version (though these days there seems to be a drinking game version of everything), and the get-to-know-you version, and the fruit-basket-version.
I was always bad at it because I never realized I'd never done something till someone else made note of it. It's not that I'm completely sheltered, or am afraid to try something new... I just appreciate my comfort zone.
There is one thing, however which I 1. Know I haven't done, and 2. Know I want to do.

What about you?

~the white shirt's a must~

Don't Turn Around

The state in which we currently reside might suggest stagnant waters. You may fear that our direction has faltered and now resides as a neglected thought in the dark corners of our minds. With all else engaging our time, we are left to our own devices, surviving on minimal time, and leftover weekends.
Such is not the case, however. With February quickly approaching, our minds remain interested in the current affairs. We see time as a growing crop, ever nearing the moment for action.
And with harvest in mind, we put on the appropriate wear and take our step. A big step. A monumental step. Together- hand in hand... and my step ever so slightly ahead.

~not entirely alone, for long~

Maybe I should Go Red?

Maybe a little scandalous. But everyone has ideas, fantasies, and weaknesses. Perhaps when you see this you are jealous or attracted (whether you will admit to it or not). There is nothing abnormal about that. We all have desires... some of us just have more control than others- or maybe they just want more control. 

Personally... the less control I have the better ;)

~it's all relative~

Back in action

So I teach a class of 13 kids, ranging from kindergarten to grade 3. I have only one kindergarten student who comes on alternate days. This student, whom I'll call Kayson, is a cheery student, who is loved by all, and is a joy to have in the class, despite his lack of knowledge regarding proper school behaviour.
I wish all kids were like him.


One day, to have him practice his numbers, I was having him role a dice, figure out what number it was, then bead that many beads onto pipe cleaners. He was loving it! After he started to really get the hang of it, I had him leave the group from the role before, and than add the two amounts together.
(and this right here is why I wish they were all more like him)
Kayson declared enthusiastically "what a fantastic idea!"

His genuine interest and zeal was a surprise- a refreshing surprise! Most of my other students are at the stage where they can't admit they are enjoying school or learning. And showing avidity towards any of my academic suggestions would be social suicide!

The most refreshing part about Kayson's enthusiasm, is that it didn't fade. As I continued to make suggestions, his fascination and curiosity persisted!
Who knew learning could be so fun!



And this is only one of the reasons why I love this kid!

~a life worth living~

Too Far Too Long

I haven't had internet for over a month... Now here it is. Yet it does not fulfil, only a further reminder of what I do not have.
I'm also missing 7th Heaven... when I had it to watch, it almost felt like I had a family to come home too- almost.

I'm pathetic. And lonely. And wishing I were in your arms.

~wrapped up tight~

Still Nothing

I am still without the technology that enables me to communicate with the rest of the world... It does not help with the isolation that is Bow Island. 

Sometimes I feel that I live in that town from Footloose... 

Got an email today that made me think, so I thought I'd share it with you.

God doesn't give you the people you want; He gives you the people you NEED... to help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you- to make you into the person you are today, and ultimately the person you are meant to be

~a reason~

Lacking pizzazz, or even just a smile

I am currently without internet and tv at my house.
Is it sad that this upsets me terribly? Have I become far to dependent on technology to entertain me and make me happy? What happened to music while cleaning, or a good book on the couch?

Oh right... my books have yet to arrive in the Dried Bean Capitol of the West. Plus I am sick of my music and have no way of purchasing more...
It might help if I had friends, or at least companions with a 1 or even 2 hour radius. But here I remain alone, with no friends- real or fake.

I don't want to say my life sucks because it could be worse. However... I'm not feeling too excited about it right now.


~just don't take my phone~

But what if...

~gah! I lack reason~