see here boy

~only our dreams have it right~

Talk About a Sick World

Yesterday we took a trip to the city. Our main purpose was to go see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 but we also dropped my sister's boyfriend off at the airport. Unfortunately that's not all we saw.

Our first scaring experience of the trip was on the highway. I was lying in the back of the vehicle with my foot elevated and earphones on. I noticed we were slowing down, simultaneously the songs were switching and I heard my sister say "what is going on?"
This caught my attention and I looked up. There was a line of about 12 vehicles stopped in front of us. I casually glanced over the vehicles looking for nothing in particular. I found something very distinct, however. There, beside the car straight in front of us, was a woman crouching beside her vehicle with a man standing next to her. Not too sure what she was doing, we looked closer. We very soon regretted that, for this rather large lady was crouching, with her pants around her ankles, in order to relieve herself, leaving her corpulent, white ass pointing directly at us! Thankfully the man opened the back passenger door to attempt to hide her.
When she was done, she got back in the car and it drove away, leaving the previously mentioned man behind. This did not seem to bother the man as he went on walking from vehicle to vehicle... for what reason we know not.

Later that evening, with this painful experience still sharp in our minds, my sister and I began our return drive. On the outskirts of the city, on the divided highway, we noticed all the oncoming traffic had stopped. As we neared we saw that this delay was due to a immense flock of Canadian Geese crossing the road. Half of the Geese had already crossed and the other half were still in progress when a Jackass in a jacked-up truck left the road and drove on to the median. The pompous jerk paid no attention to propriety and nature drove around his fellow drivers and right into the crossing flock! One unfortunate bird got stuck on the underbelly of his ride and was dragged for several feet, at an unbearably fast speed, before it got free. It attempted to join his family but was unable to walk, and many of the birds came over to him.
The rest of the vehicles continued to wait.


Respect is a lost art. The world is under the perception that they are entitled to their own way with their own controls, and the rest of the world can "suck it".

~we witnessed two ugly asses in one day~

No More Expectations

My boyfriend texted  me the other day about his Friday night. As he's telling me he adds in I was a good boy too. Not sure exactly what he meant, I questioned his meaning, to which he responds Drunk blond kept trying to get me to kiss her... no dice


While I was grateful for his loyalty I questioned whether he truly thought that this was that big of a feat- is it not expected that a boy is loyal to his girlfriend, and vice-versa?
He commented that Is it really expected now-a-day. That kind of honesty is a bit of a dead art I think He went on to say It just seems everyone is more concerned on getting more notches on the belt than anything...
At first I was rather discussed with this... but then i realized how sad... and true this is.


Society today teaches us to do whatever it takes to make yourself happy, no matter that consequences!
It honestly sickens me, and makes me fear for the future... for when I have children- if it's this bad now, what will my kids be faced with in 20 years!

~Love thy neighbours as thyself~

Hey! Guess What- I Like You

No "L" word
No ring
No forever
Just now, with underlaying possibilities.
I'm still not certain, so I'm not going to push.
But open your eyes, the potentials remain and flourish.
Be ready to open your hand when I'm ready to squeeze tight and jump

~an enthusiastic Smile~

Too Little Too Late

Pointed out to me: A revelation? A confession? A desire? It was too much for you too take, so you lost it. Obviously your want was lacking, and could not measure up. Now all you have to hold is your bottle. And I am being held by someone new.


What Is And Should Never Be

And if I say to you tomorrow 
Take my hand, child, come with me
It's to a castle I will take you
Where what's to be they say will be

Catch the wind- see us spin
Sail away- leave the day
Way up high in the sky
Then the wind won't blw
You really shouldn't go
It only goes to show
That you will be mine
By taking our time- oooh!

And if you say to me tomorrow
Oh, what fun it all would be
Then what's to stop is, pretty baby
But what is and what should never be

Catch the wind

So if you wake up with the sunrise
And all your dreams are still as new
And happiness is what you need so bad
Girl, the answer lies with you, yeah

Catch the wind

Everybody I know seems to know me wellBut does anybody know I'm going to move like hell

-Led Zeppelin

~the 'what if's' are haunting you~

Living On Scaffold

you can't fall-
you have no rope
so don't get too tangled up in me*

so high up
with no one to catch you
you aren't as invincible as you feel

we're untied
vulnerable to height
and yet here we keep dancing

warnings are lost
blowing away in the wind
cause we are too tangled to listen

~for a time on a high perch~


*I am not responsible for these lines. While my sister and I were painting a house this summer, high up on the scaffold, she unknowingly spoke them to me. Of course they were used in a very different context, but it inspired me. So thank you to my sister.

She's Just Minding Her Own Business

She wandered by, taking her time, she'd stop to window shop
Saw his reflection in the glass, he passed his eyes on me
If you've got something to say girl, don't walk away girl, give me a good reaction.
If you've got something to say boy, I ain't got all day boy, go ahead ask me a question

Oooh la la la Oooh la la la Oooh la la la
Ohhhhhhhh
Here comes love
check out the song here

Sometimes the songs that say the most, are the simple ones- straight to the point. As much as I enjoy intricate metaphors that excite my literature-obsessed mind, there are moments when clearly expressed feelings and ideas are refreshing.

~so don't forget who's taking you home, or in who's arms you're going to be~

A New Not-So-Fearful Step

I find myself on a new course, one never yet sailed in my time. Fear has become a subsidiary emotion behind thrill, love, hope, and uncertainty. Time may bring about change, but for now I am governed by a new light.
I look forward to the unknown, with hands to hold and hearts to share. Such alterations, I appear barely recognizable!
There still remain issues to be patched, and ironed, but in time and with experience all will be as good as new- if not better!


~new pieces for the quilt~

the magic is gone

at least you care enough to notice
the lack of response didn't come with a cold shoulder
i still have a heart, as do you
thankfully you can partially show it
i won't pretend i didn't want it to sting
for pain only brings you to life
opening your eyes to the morrow
dismal and dark without me
suck it up, and pine
for what you lost cannot be recovered


~the grass is always greener~

Forecasted Storm Clouds

The authorities predict rain and storms. Our hopes and plans to be kiboshed, forgotten as if never holding importance. Our lives left to the fate dictated by others' voices.
However, we sit at ease and content, wishing to throw caution to the wind and ignore the inevitable calamity. The rain feels refreshingly cool in its attempts to extinguish our passion. Let the clouds come, rain fall, and wind blow, for that which is built to last will survive.

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add colour to my sunset sky
-Rabindranath Tagore

~sharing the umbrella~

A live, breathing, functioning Girl

We're not creepers, we just like to be aware of our surroundings, familiar with the going-ons of those around us. It provides a comfortable bubble of sorts. This way we know what to expect, and what sorts of activities and signs might suggest assistance is required (our the need for us to seek shelter). Really it is what makes us good neighbours.
I've previously mentioned our neighbours (Ugly Naked Guy and Greasy Computer Guy). My roommates and I had the... unfortunate experience of being witness to much of their personal life. Thankfully, it has been a while since such an incident has occurred.

The other day, however, I witnessed a most unusual event. As I was heading downstairs, I looked out our window that faced UNG and GCG house and what did I see- a GIRL taking out the trash!
Instantly the following quote from Beauty and the Beast popped into mind.

Chip: Momma, there's a girrrrl in the castle!
Mrs. Potts: Now Chip, I won't have you making up such wild stories.
Chip: But really, momma, I saw her.
Mrs. Potts: Not another word. Into the tub.
3rd party: A girl! I saw a girl in the castle!
Chip: See, I told ya!

Now I am not comparing any of the people involved to a disney character (I wish!). My point is, that Kara and I (for as soon as I saw her I called for her to come see as well, this way they had to believe me!) were about as shocked as Mrs. Potts to find a girl in that vicinity.
She was no Belle... I'm sure that we could come up with some nickname for her as well, maybe something relating to the colours in her hair. But for now we will remain shocked, and keep our eyes peeled for a second showing of this seemingly miraculous creature.

~Here in town there's only she, who is beautiful as me, so I'm making plans to woo and marry Belle~

Out with the Old, In with the New

Our fridge is on the verge of failure. We all know it is coming, and yet are hesitant to admit it- who knows what that may trigger! Kara called our landlord (who happens to be in Newfoundland, of course!) and informed his wife about our relationship with the fridge being on the rocks. She didn't doubt it (who didn't see this coming!).

Suggesting that we give the fridge a rest, maybe slowly ease him out of his duties, maybe move everything from the freezer into the mini-deep-freeze, in case of a complete breakdown, may do us some good.
A few days later, Mrs. Landlord called to give us the good news- she had found a replacement. Brand new and in top notch order! How could we deny such an offer!

And so, this evening, Kara and I found ourselves sorting through the fridge. Having to make decisions about what is worth keeping, and what is past it's time (literally and figuratively) was not a quick task. We came across a slew of interesting articles, a few that we had no recollection of and others we wish we had no recollection of!


While I sat on the floor, scrubbing the mess and stain (or as much as possible) from the shelves, a revelation came to me- isn't this just like life. There comes a time when certain elements of life are no longer functional and a complete revamping is required. It may not always be easy, or fun, but in the end well worth the pain.

~all that glitters is... not always gold~

The L Word

Over used and abused. That which should mean the world, is freely shared with the world. An open threat, sent but never delivered.
A promise in a word no longer meant. A spoken passion overshadowed in the world's corruption. The dream of a young girl, perverted by the lost.
Their search for truth lead them here, but they took it and defaced it. Their truth is false, and they remain lost. Ignorance fails to bring bliss, for bliss is found in validity.
You run from the truth, and throw the word around to distract us. A camouflage more effective by the day. Live on in your masquerade, but know the veil will fade in time, and all that will remain is the truth in a word you fail to accept.

~refuse to be enlisted~

Not Alone in Our Foolish State

Eyes are focused and directed
Minds are buzzing with wonderment
Looks of disbelief are shared
A wave of simulated encouragement

I don't notice
nor do I care

My senses are overwhelmed from you
Your hand in mine stupefies
Your voice in my ear electrifies
Your scent charms my very essence
The taste of your kiss presides over all
All the while, your eyes smile back


~no one likes to be alone~

Here I Am

You can only walk along the same path for so many years (19 to be exact) before you come to a fork. An inevitable reality to be certain.
From one angle I think well it is about frickin' time, i'm getting sick of the this road. The contradicting opinion realizes that along the way there have been numerous bumps, turns, and changes in landscape and terrain; there were good times, bad times, and times when what lay around the bend was indecipherable- things were rarely dull! So why must I end this journey and change courses?
I'm sure each path has much to offer, but from my standpoint, I am unsure of what those things are. Not knowing what lays ahead frightens me. I am prepared to stop here and have a picnic- holding off the decision until I have more information, or a sudden burst of inspiration. What's wrong with enjoying where I am at and making an informed decision...

~flashing arrows would be much appreciated~

To Be Me

I Miss You like Drama Queens and Cat Fights and Braces on Prom Night*

Last evening, on our way to our final class of our university career, Mason and I met, and quickly passed a young boy. As we passed by, he stopped and curled over, as if he were in severe pain or was going to be sick. Concerned I turned to him in preparation to offer assistance.
Upon taking a better look however, I noticed that he was caring something. A heavy something. It was a weight- it must have been at least a 25 lbs!
We left him to his workout and continued to class.

In a way we are all like that kid. We are walking around with a huge weight that slows us down, and causes pain. And to what end? Sure that boy may build some muscle if he continues this strict regime, but will it improve him as a person?
And if we continue to carry our weight around, what will we gain- callouses? bitterness? grief?

Perhaps you're head the song The Weight by The Band. The chorus goes something like this:
Take a load off Annie, take a load for free; take a load off Annie, and you can put the load right on me

It makes me wonder... who is saying this to us? Are we listening?

~it's an investment~

*Miss You Being Gone The Band Perry

New Addiction

Here is a wordle of my poems. It gives you a quick idea of what I write about most. No surprises. However, in collecting these poems I realized how long it's been since I've written any poetry. It seems I've lost my muse. at least temporarily. I suppose that's what happens when I've recently had little to no reason for me to gripe over the opposite sex.

~a snap shot of my heart and mind~

A bad combo

Alcohol and sex don't mix.
And by alcohol I mean wine specifically, and by sex I mean the dessert, sex in a pan. I made It yesterday to go with the nice dinner I made for Mason (and my roommates). It's wonderful... it truly does live up to it's name!

So tonight, while sitting on the couch "writing my paper" I decided, what better way to bare this misery, than to drown myself in some leftover sex and wine. And so I did.
Now I lay here with more than a discomfort in my throat and stomach... the strong sense of nausea weighs me down. Instead of relishing in the brilliance that is my mind, I am cursing the frail pit that is my stomach.

Since when does my stomach struggle from the food I inhale? Am I growing weak in my... young age?

Pain, discomfort, regret... not the sensations one wishes to endure after a night of wine and sex.


~I've been rocked~

A Guiding Light

Last year in my practicum, I taught a grade 4 class. A huge chunk of my time there was devoted to my teaching the "Light and Shadows" unit from the Science curriculum. Now many of you know I'm not a huge science girl... but it ended up being a ton of fun. How come as you get older, the available topics of study in science narrow, and interesting thing like "Light" is forgotten!

Anyway, integration is a huge deal- and I completely agree with that! So for one of my LA lessons (LA is language arts, and I was teaching poetry!) my practicum teacher had found a poem to go along with my science unit! Is there anything more fun than that?

The point... I am currently working on a project for my tech class, and I am basing it on the "Light and Shadows" unit I taught last year. While working on this I found a copy of the poem. Not only did it bring back some great memories, but the poem also spoke to me.

Here is a copy of it for you to read and [hopefully] enjoy.

Someone Else’s Light by Elaine Laron

The sun is filled with shining light, it blazes far and wide.

The moon reflects the sunlight back, but has no light inside.

I think I'd rather be the sun, that shines so bold and bright.

Than be the moon, that only glows with someone else's light.

~What part are you playing?~

Advice?

So there is this girl... I'll call her Kenadie, who likes Mason. She texts him all the time, always wants to hangout, and now... she wants to go watch him play soccer.
Their history as acquaintances isn't long. Kenadie is friends with the girl that Mason's best friend (we'll call him Casanova) occasionally fools around with. They went on a "double date" that wasn't even a double date because Mason was dating me, and was dragged along by Casanova.

She's aware that Mason isn't available, but isn't backing down.  I don't want to be a crazy girlfriend... but is it a bad thing that this bugs me? Should I feel threatened? Do I have a right to be upset?

Mason assures me that they're just friends, and only get together periodically to "keep in touch." It's not that I don't trust Mason... It's that I don't trust Kenadie.


~Jealousy is no more than feeling alone against smiling enemies (Elizabeth Bowen)~

Sometimes I wonder... why me?

A Magic Carpet Ride

I once was satisfied with 'something', because at least 'something' was better than nothing. This way I was only partially lonely, and periodically felt important. On good days I could believe that I was wanted, and someone would be there fighting for me. I thought that we were still young, and expecting anything more than that was outrageous and unreasonable. We just needed time to grow up.

Now that I have 'everything' I see that having only 'something' diminished my self worth. Who knew that there was someone out there who wanted this too, and openly acknowledged it! I now see all is better than some. To be treated like you matter all the time beats occasional value any day. And who knew there was someone who willingly put your happiness over theirs! I thought I could only find this in the fictional world!


~A whole new world, a new fantastic point of view~

Foot Poppin'

I have the VHS version of Princess Diaries . I loved that movie, and really, what young girl doesn't love a Cinderella story. Anne Hathaway (before she was anyone) and Julie Andrews... Julie Andrews teaching and guiding Anne through what it takes to reach her true potential... in the movie and probably in real life as well!

A story of a girl looking for love -or more specifically a "foot popping kiss"- torn between sudden popularity and attention, and what's real.
But isn't that what we're all trying to figure out, what's true from what's a passing fad or a lie. That's one thing about romantic comedies, they have enough reality in them that we almost forget about the romantic twists and believe that "hey, it could happen!"


"because you saw me when I was invisible"

Check One

Growing up I was not always the most adventurous eater. When I told my mother I didn't like something, she would tell me that I could not make that judgement without first trying it. Often (though I didn't admit it to her), upon trying the supposed unpalatable food, I found to enjoy it more than I earlier expected.
This can be applied to more than just questionable food. Life is about experiencing, learning and making mistakes. Sure there are things to definitely avoid, but there are also waters out there that should be tested. So next time you come across a river, lake, sea, or puddle, weigh your options. Is it worth the effort of trying to jump or cross the water remaining dry, or could you risk dipping your toe in... who knows what may happen.


~sometimes you have to just take a chance. and if your scared of the past, just remember it's the past for a reason and it's not worth missing out on great things that could come in the future. take a chance, have no regrets~